agony or bliss ?

How confident we feel to think that we are the makers of our own future!
I have realized in past and also realizing it now, that there is nothing in this world that we can control, except our own attitude.

I live in a loft style apartment, really cool one! it is sort of a separate unit, sharing one wall with my neighbor. and now, something happened that I will have to vacate it.

I am in love with this apartment. I have a patio, right on a small man-made pond. the so called bed room is upstairs, gives a feel of a house! I love this apartment during summers! I can sit on the steps at the pond in my patio, sipping through watermelon juice, that's one of my rituals during summer. handing out candies to those playing kids, chatting with neighbors while walking past the common entrance. I have two private entrances for my apartment! There are lesser amenities here, but the patio on the pond and slanting roof, huge windows flooding the whole place with sunrise were making up for it. I will have to give this up next week.

I then thought that I have two choices, either be in agony of leaving the apartment i am in love with for last 4 years or be optimistic about bigger kitchen, more amenities, and possibility of getting satellite dish for Indian channels!

I am more leaning towards the second choice :) , bit expensive though, I am realizing the cost of owning big screen tv, furniture, etc. It is expensive to move with all these stuff! thank god, I did not go for a couch yet, and got just settled with a futon!

this might also be symbolic, I am ready to welcome big changes in life, anticipating many more changes to come along the way.

I'm moving out on the memorial day long weekend, which starts on May 25. Ironically, this is also the date, my grandma passed away last year... may her soul be at peace. remembering her, I will start moving out...